Two Grief Sonnets

         It’s not that I felt nothing. I felt nothingness.

                 -- Clive James


                               1

I see a sorrow nothing can dispel.

   I see dull eyes that used to wink and play.

I see a jewel constricted by a shell.

   What do you need to wipe this grief away?

Despair is now the state that you inhabit.

   It hunts you like a roaring Chevrolet

While your soul stands there frozen like a rabbit.

   What will it take to help you run away?

And when you think life’s empty, cold and black,

   Or that nobody hears you when you pray,

Tell me—and I will always answer back:

   What can I do to wash your pain away?

      I’m here to give you what you always give

      To me—a day-by-day reason to live.

 

                             2

 

I’ll be the bowl when grief melts you away.

   When you reach out, I’ll be the hand you hold.

When all seems dark as night, I’ll be your day.

   I’ll be the heart that warms when yours grows cold.

I’ll be your certainty when you feel doubt.

    Whenever you feel terror, I’ll be brave.

I’ll be the shovel that will dig you out

   When you bury yourself in sorrow’s grave.

A friend, a scold, a comforter, an ear;

   A crutch, a noodge, a pessimist, Candide;

A clown, a priest, the stars by which you steer—

   I’ll never stop being the thing you need.

      You’re stronger than you think—and till you see

      And know the truth of that, just lean on me.

 

Copyright 2016 Matthew J Wells